Thanks for visiting my blog! I am truly glad you are here! I hope when you read, God’s heart for you will be revealed a little more. I know usually as I am writing, He is showing me new things about Himself and clarifying things in my heart. Much of what I write is for me as much as for the reader. I hope this is a place where the weary, the disappointed, the questioning and the hopeful can come. 

This blog was born in 2015 right after a time in my life when I had come to a place in my walk with God where I was disappointed in the Christian life. I know I wouldn’t have been able to actually articulate it, but I was wondering why the promises I read about in the Bible didn’t seem to be actually true in my very inner life. I was doing all the right things like reading the Bible, praying, serving in church and interacting with God daily, but I was still chaotic in my inner world. I had attributed the chaos to our many losses in our first 10 years of marriage, but when life calmed down and my inner life only felt more chaotic, I was concerned. God asked me to get out of everything I was doing at church and I wondered if I was losing faith, but what was really happening was God was finding me. 

In that year, He began to show me His deep love for me. I had many misconceptions about Him that kept me from knowing Him deeply and caused me to keep pieces of myself from Him. He has truly set my feet on solid ground and I have seen Him drastically change my life since then. Knowing His love for us changes everything. I long to see others know His heart for them and walk in the freedom that He paid for.  It was for feedom that He set us free and only when we know His heart for us, can we walk in that.  I have known God for a long time and as the years have gone by, I can see the story of my life more clearly. He has been working sometimes in plain view above the surface and sometimes under the surface, but He’s always been pursuing, loving and winning my heart. We never arrive and can never know the depths of God, but we can live a life of discovering Him. The story is here: https://wendygerdes.com/wendy-gerdes/disappointment-to-deeper-intimacy-soul-care-retreat-transcript

The early blogs are me processing my life with Him and writing about what I was discovering and working through. The blogs are a little long so I really appreciate all those who read in those years and kept with it until the end. In those years my helpful husband suggested a shorter length, but what did he know? I needed to get the words out.  I then took a class with Bob Goff who also believed in being less wordy. I believed Bob Goff which meant I had to admit to John that he was right all along. There is a bit of a break where I didn’t often write because of the busy season my family was in. The newer blogs are shorter and hopefully a bit easier to read. I am planning on posting 1-2 times a week again now that my life is more conducive to writing again. If you are enjoying it, you can subscribe to have each new blog sent to your email. We all want more email, right?

My family is my favorite thing about my life and I am sure I have learned as much from them as they have learned from me. I have been married to my amazing husband, John, for almost 23 years and we have four children who are 21, 20, 18 and 14. For so many years, I would say to myself that ‘the days are long, but the years are short’ trying to remember that the day would come when they would leave and the young years would all blur into what would be their childhood. What I hope they remember is  God is active in our lives and He is always wanting to be found by us. If we feel we’ve come to know everything there is to know about Him, we’ve made Him too small. He will never be less loving than we hope Him to be. And the biggest thing I hope they remember is that if we hope in Him we will truly never be disappointed, and if we are, it’s okay because it is only Him whispering to us that there is more.